simplicity 2016: anything in a dress

Last year I counted the dresses in my closet.

31. 31 dresses, a majority of them unworn.

This year, I chose one dress.

One dress to wear for the entire month.

Why? Because... simplicity.

Last year I participated in Dressember, did fundraising, took pictures, read books and opened my mind to that which makes me deeply saddened and at times, helpless.

This year, I chose to do it again.

But, with this theme of simplicity, I wanted to be more intentional.

I wanted to be less focused on myself, and more focused on the cause.

I thought that maybe if I wore the same dress for the entire month, it would free up my mind to focus on things that have greater meaning.

I thought that if I wasn't thinking about how to outfit myself for the day, I could devote 10 minutes more each day to fighting for freedom.

At the end of the month, that's 310 minutes. Over three hours. Not necessarily a lot, but it's something.

The first few days were annoying. Which is such a first world problem, but it's still true.

I was trying to figure out different ways to wear the dress. Trying to mix it up a little. Also trying to stay warm. Because....winter.

Around day five, I really wanted to not wear it anymore. I wanted my jeans and hoodies.

I felt bored.

Which is exactly where I think I needed to be.

So I pushed on, and kept wearing that dress.

To every single Christmas party. To every staff event. To every church function.

The same dress.

Day fourteen was the shift. And I thought it would be.

Two weeks in seemed ample time to feel like I was getting into this new rhythm and habit.

I figured out how to wear it in the most comfortable way.
People weren't commenting on it anymore.
In fact, I don't think people were even noticing.

I was posting my pics each day, really and truly able to focus on how I wanted to share the message and focus on what I was truly asking people to do.

Then, this weekend, it hit me.

I mentioned before that I was bored with the dress after the first few days.

I think I was bored because I actually have found quite a bit of my identity in how I look and in how I present myself.

In college, I would not leave the dorm without making sure my outfit was on point, my lashes looked good and my hairs were unmovable. #hairsprayfordays

There was a lot of focus on me. And honestly, I don't think that was the healthiest of things.

I don't think there is anything wrong with looking nice, or wanting to be your best. Not at all.

Because this month, I have tried to look my best and make this dress look good.

I just know myself. And all my focus on the outward appearance was just a cover for some deeply rooted insecurities.

But, this month. That shifted.

And it just seems like wearing the same dress every day for the entire month seems to have put a few things in perspective for me.

1. People do not love me because of what I wear, or how I look. People love me for me.
2. Some people think it's really weird to wear the same thing every day. I don't. As long as I am neat and clean, I don't really care if it's the same thing.
3. I feel like I am working smarter, not harder. 
4. Wearing the same thing consecutively might become a habit.
5. I think Jesus wants me to focus less on vanity, and more on substance.
6. My feelings of self worth are more solid now than they were a month ago.
7. Consistency doesn't have to feel suffocating, it can actually feel quite freeing.

Maybe some of these won't make any sense to you. Or maybe they will.

All I know is, I have spent the last month in the exact same dress, and I think it's one of the best things I've done for myself in a long time.

Dressember has this saying, "You can do anything in a dress." And I know this to be true. Not because I have spent the last month doing it, but because I grew up doing it.

Growing up, you wore dresses all day, every day - if you were a girl that is. It was this really legalistic and controlling thing, and honestly, it was pretty damaging to a lot of my friends.

So when Dressember first appeared on my radar, I was skeptical. 

Skeptical if it would really be that big of a deal for me. 

Skeptical if my friends who still choose to wear only dresses would be able to jump on board and want to participate.

This year, I think I finally got over that skepticism. 

It doesn't matter what the past narrative has been, or what I fear the future narrative will be. 

What matters is that there is a platform to talk about freedom. 

And as women, we are powerful advocates to affect long lasting change.

I guess that's the other thing this dress has taught me. 

The past doesn't have to control the future. But it should propel us forward to make it better.

Who would've thought? I learned all that from a dress.

#simplicity2016

simplicity 2016: jesus the minimalist

Last week, I got to share about this topic of simplicity with my intern family at Serve Seattle.

Maybe this is super silly, but you guys, it was so much fun.

The process of gathering information, researching, compiling everything I've learned, creating a power point, sharing with the group and then being on the podcast - it was all amazing.

I think sharing what Jesus is doing in your life should feel amazing, right?

When my friend Kyle asked me to speak on simplicity, I asked him if there was anything in particular he thought I should land on. His response was basically just this, "Yeah, just share your journey and then also share what Jesus says about simplicity."

Oh yeah... Jesus.

Oops...

Sometimes, I get pretty involved in my projects, and forget to check back in with the Lord about it.

I hear what He wants me to focus on loud and clear, but then I forget to check back and see if there is more He wants to say.

In preparation for this talk, I was amazing at what Jesus had to say about minimalism and simplicity.

For instance.....

The Rich Young Ruler - This dude. This dude said he wanted to follow Jesus. Even become one of the disciples. But when Jesus asked him to do exactly as the disciples had done, and give up everything to follow Him, he just couldn't let go. His things and the false sense of comfort they gave him mattered more in the moment than the life changing act of following Jesus. If I am being totally honest, I am not sure that I wouldn't have also hesitated. Because as much as I love Jesus, and as much as I try to practice simplicity, I still get alot of joy from my things...

Mary and Martha - Jesus comes to hang out. Mary sits and learns. Martha storms around the house being pissed because her sister isn't helping her. Jesus tells Martha to calm the heck down and be more like Mary. I usually feel sorry for Martha, because it totally would've been me, but not this time. This time it stood out to me that Jesus never asked Martha to do all that extra work. He just wanted to teach her. He wanted to give her a gift that most women would never get to have. And she was cleaning. Priorities Martha.

Breakfast on the Beach - You know how in the book of John, Jesus makes breakfast for the disciples on the beach? What stood out to me in that story was that Jesus prepared this simple meal, in a simple way, in a simple place so that the purpose of fellowship wouldn't be lost. How often do I try to plan the perfect thing only to have the heart of the matter be lost in the process.


I guess I shouldn't have been surprised, but I really was. Jesus had so much to say about our relationship to our stuff and His desire for us to focus on the things that matter.

I still feel like I have a long way to go, but man, this year has been a lot into perspective for me.

My five most reflective take away's were:

1. Less stuff means less managing which means more time for the things I love.
2. Handling the unknowns and the curve balls of life feels less terrifying.
3. I am a better listener because my mind isn't full of things that don't matter.
4. Making decisions based on what I want not what I think other people expect me to do.
5. Jesus wants really good things for me, and He is bring them into my life now that the unnecessary is out

There are a hundred other things I could write, but then this would be a book and that's not #simplicity.

Maybe you are thinking about a life that is simpler, more easy, less overwhelming and stressful. I'm by no means an expert, but I can say that it's changed how I am walking through this season of life. 

It's changing how I interact with people and it's changing how I decide what I want my future to look like. 

Which is an incredible empowering thing to feel. And that's what it's really about. The journey and what we gain by traveling it. Not just what's at the other end waiting for us.

"The goal of simplicity is not to have the least amount of stuff; it's to have the most room in your heart for things that matter."

simplicity 2016: dressember

"So wait, you're wearing the same dress. For the entire month?"

This is the question that I have gotten the most when I tell people about my plan for Dressember.

For those that don't know, Dressember is an anti-trafficking awareness campaign that takes place every December. Women around the globe commit to wearing a dress every day for the entire month. 

They take photos in their dresses and share on social media. They also raise money that goes to two grant partners that work to rescue individuals directly out of trafficking situations. 

It's pretty cool.

But the thing is, just wearing a dress doesn't rescue people.

Wearing a dress starts a conversation.

And by having conversations, we educate. And hopefully change some narratives and stories that are out there regarding women.

That is, where I believe, the power really lies. When we change the narrative in our head, and when we are more open to the action steps that need to happen, change occurs.

So why the same dress.

When I decided to practice a year of simplicity, I knew I wanted it to permeate every area of my life that it could. Even Dressember.

So, in keeping with my theme, I will be wearing the same dress for the entire month.

I didn't think I would care one way or the other if I wore the same thing. I mean, I wear the same jeans all week sometimes.

But in total transparency, I got up this morning and felt a twinge of sadness as I looked at all the clothes that were just going to sit there for a month.

Which sounds so silly. To be sad that clothes will be left unworn. But, silly or not, I felt it.

And that's one reason why I think this process will be good for me.I think it will be good to not focus so much on what I wear. But instead, to focus on the issue of human trafficking.

To focus on raising as much money as we can to fund rescue missions. To become more educated about how I can get involved with local organizations that are fighting this evil. To get outside of myself and realize my privilege. To ask questions and be curious about things that are happening outside my sphere. And work to change the things that take away the freedom and dignity of others.

And if wearing the same dress every day for a month gives me the space to do that, then I think it is a good thing.

The Dressember campaign has a quote, "The heart of Dressember is FREEDOM -- that every woman has the right to live a vibrant and autonomous life."

This is probably the single most inspiring thing about this campaign -- at least for me. The truth that every woman (man and child) has the right to freedom, dignity and respect.

And that's a message I want to share with the world. Because I think that mentality can change the world.

#simplicity2016

***if you are interested in participating, or in joining my team - click here for more info

simplicity 2016: instant coffee is gross

Last post I blabbed on and on about how great it is to shop with cash and how much popcorn I eat.

This week I am going to blab about how I am a big fat liar and the cash keeps disappearing from my wallet.

Oh, and I am also going to blab about the fact that I will never give up popcorn.

Do you hear me?

Never.

Real talk though? I was seriously considering giving up on this paying in cash thing this week.

Because by Wednesday I had spent all but $5 of my weekly budget.

Yes, you read that correctly.

By Wednesday.

Sheesh. What is wrong with me....

Anywho....

With my aforementioned $5, I took myself to Target Wednesday evening because I needed some ish.

Some lady stuffs, some coffee cream, some coffee. Stuff that is super boring but I am telling you about it anyway.

So, you're welcome.

I honestly do not know why I walked so confidently into the store. Like, $5 wasn't going to get all that stuff.

Okay, I actually forgot I needed coffee when I first walked in, and that's probably why my walk was so confident. Because when I realized that I needed coffee after grabbing my other stuff, I panicked.

Because... coffee.... #neednotwant

Yeah, I almost broke down and bought some of those delicious beans with my debit card right then and there. They were calling my name. Loudly and quite provocatively to be honest. Skanky beans...

But NO! I made a commitment dang it! And I was going to keep it.....

Even though I really love coffee (insert lots of tears)

All of a sudden, I had this idea. What about sample packs of coffee? Surely Target had to have something like that.

And they did. Just not for a dollar. Which is all I had left. #dangit

Then I saw it. Smiling down on me with it's obviously cheap packaging and super affordable price tag.

Instant coffee.

Specifically, Cuban instant coffee.

Because it was $.25 cheaper than Folgers instant coffee.

I'll shoot straight with you guys... I should've paid the extra $.25

This stuff tasted like that instant cappuccino powder that your mom used to keep in the cupboard for "special occasions."

For four days I drank the kind of coffee you drink on a missions trip. Acrid, thick, really dark, and kind of questionable smelling.

I can also say that I have never in my life used so much creamer in my coffee. I am hands down going to have cavities from this experience.

Yesterday I bought coffee beans and this morning I almost wept with joy as I poured liquid gold into my tumbler.

It was a truly spiritual moment. Angels were singing. Harps played backup. It was a good cup of joe.

In all seriousness, it really hit me hard when I only had a $1.00 leftover to buy coffee.

It hit me because people in America, and in other countries, live like that all the time.

They don't have the luxury of choosing dark roast or blonde roast. They don't have the choice of french vanilla or hazelnut. Grande or Vente.

Their choices are based on what they can afford, down to the very last penny.

The rest of the week felt pretty humbling. Because even though I have money in the bank and could totally buy coffee and be fine, I was pushing myself outside the comfort zone I have created.

I thought about that every time I opened a packet of that instant coffee.

It was a really interesting place to hang out.

I realized I am so much more blessed than I thought. I have so much more accessible to me than I acknowledge. And, I really have such a greater capacity to give back than what I have been telling myself I did.

So, if I have a clearer picture of what is entrusted to me financially because of a box of instant coffee, then it was $.94 well spent.

It was so gross. But it taught me well. And for that I am thankful.

#simplicity2016

simplicity 2016: #nospendnovember

When I was 8 years old, my mom took me to the bank, and we opened my very first savings account.

I would say that this is my earliest memory surrounding the concept of money.

The second was when I started getting an allowance and my parents used that to teach monetary responsibility.

Then I saved my money to buy my American Girl doll.

I later started babysitting and buying my own clothes.

High school came and I created a budget and was able to save up and buy a car.

And basically since then, I've been fairly good with my money. At least I thought so.

****

Like I mentioned in my previous post, I'm practicing No Spend November. Or at least a Limited Spend November.

Because I wanted to see where my money was really going.

I wanted to challenge this belief that my finances didn't really need any work. That I am so good and solid I don't need to work on it.

Oh hey pride...

Anyway....when I started thinking about lessening my spending, I started to think about how I used to spend money when I was younger.

When I opened that bank account. When I saved for a my doll. When I paid for my clothes and saved for a car.

I payed mostly in cash.

Which is fascinating when you think about it in contrast to how we typically spend today.

Credit cards, debit cards, PayPal, Apple Pay, etc....

There is this interesting thing that happens when you pay with cash. When a physical transaction occurs.

You pay attention to what is being handed over. You pay attention to what you get back.
You feel the deficit, the lightness in your wallet and you are more aware of what is left over.

With these thoughts in mind, I trudged forward into Week One of No Spend November #cashonly

****

Wow...

I eat out a lot and buy ALOT of popcorn.....

Now I didn't do that this week. I just realized how much I was doing it when I was spending with my debit card.

And because I am not bouncing checks or overdrawing my account each month, I wasn't really paying attention.

I mean sure, I would notice my spending was up on Mint.com, but since I was consistently saving and putting money aside for the future, I figured it didn't really matter.

How very foolish that thought process was more me....

You see, this week gave me some "aha" moments:

• I have believed a lie about what the amount of money I make means for me and my lifestyle
• Meal prepping is a thing and it's super good for me and my stress levels.
• I'm checking my bank account balance less
• The act of being able to purchase food is really powerful
• 
  

****

That last one stuck with me. And because it did, I want to share a story from this week.

I stopped by the store on saturday to pick up a couple things.

Yes, one was popcorn. But don't stress. I used cash.

Anyway, the couple in front of me were trying to pay for their groceries, but were having trouble with their card.

Which, is a super hard spot to be in. Especially when a line of people are forming behind you.

So I asked if I could pay for their groceries. They said yes. They got their OJ. It was cool.

And after I did, the cashier said, "Well, looks like you did your good deed for the week."

Um....gross...

Doing good and being kind shouldn't be a weekly task we check off. It shouldn't be something we do to feel better about ourself.

I truly believe that Jesus calls each of us to a constant spirit of generosity. An immediate willingness to give back to those who may or may not be having a tough time.

I didn't pay for their groceries because I wanted a high five. And I didn't share the story for praise.

I shared it for two reasons:

1. I can totally relate to not being able to pay for something due to lack of funds.
2. I think we all can be more generous and aware of others needs than we are.

And really, that's what I want this month to be about. I want it to be about discovering how much farther my dollars can go towards doing good. I want my life to be more about other people and less about me.

I don't think I am going to stop doing fun things, traveling or occasionally eating out. But, I definitely don't want those things to financially define me.

I just want to do some good.

#simplicity2016

simplicity 2016: a hundred bucks a week

Oh simplicity, bless your little heart. It is almost November and you have taught me so much.

I feel like I still have a lot to learn, but man, it's been so great. Exploring what it looks like to do more with less, to not complicate things, and to just enjoy what I have.

About a month and a half ago, when summer started to wind down and fall was beginning to be upon us, I started thinking about how I wanted to end the year.

Last year I ended with Dressember, and while I will be doing that again this year, I wanted to take it one step further.

I mentioned often in my blog posts that this year, I'm trying to focus on three specific areas of simplicity: stuff, money, technology.

And while I have a tendency to be hard on myself, and think that I am totally failing at life and this simplicity thing, I have to admit that it has gone pretty well.

I mean, I got rid of SO much stuff, I am saving more money than I was back in January and at times, I am on my phone less. Except when one of my interns turns me onto a new iPhone game.

Then it's bad.

Thanks a lot SarahJ...

But, this idea of spending less continues to intrigue me.

I look at my grandparents, I look at my friends in other countries, I read WAY to many articles on BuzzFeed... and I notice how happy and content people can be when they use what they have and spend less money.

I notice it the most in my own life when I am on vacation, or when I am traveling. I notice I am much more mindful of what things costs. I pay attention to what I do or don't buy. And I tend to use more cash than I do card.

It never fails, I am always surprised by how much money I have left over and how reduced my spending habits become.

So... how to translate all of that to the last month or two of 2016?

Cue "No Spend November." 

(If you don't know what it is, then just get on Pinterest, and you will wish you had never asked)

Originally, I was going to cut out all extra expenses for 30 days.

And while that might be a good idea in the future, we are coming up on the holiday season and I still would really like to go out with friends and immerse myself in some of the local festivities.

So, instead of a total spending freeze, I broke down my monthly expenses to see what the average weekly spending should be.

And then I lowered it 20%. Not an exact science by any means, but 10% felt to minor to feel the difference and 50% seemed unrealistic. So I found something in the middle.

For the next month, I am giving myself $120/week in cash to spend on groceries, gas, spending money, etc.

Once it's gone, it's gone. So I have to be strategic. Innovative. Scrappy.

The only exceptions for using a card are:

• if it's a purchase already in my budget (i.e. cell phone bill)
• if it's an emergency (i.e. stranded on the road, medical, etc)
• if for some reason I cannot pay with cash. (And if that is the case, I take the cash amount and reimburse my account)

My goal for the month is two fold.

I want to be a little more disciplined in my spending and see how I do with less.

And, I want to identify the areas in which I can be more generous with my finances.

I am realizing more and more that so many people have  far less than I do.

So, if I can be more frugal and give back, I think that's a good thing.

Especially since Jesus said a little something about that in Luke 11:5

Wish me luck and I'll keep you posted on my #nospendnovember

#simplicity2016

simplicity 2016: what is dressember?

Two years ago I attended an event at Seattle Pacific University that was raising awareness about human trafficking. It was a documentary showing and it was super intense. At least for me.

I'll be honest, it left me feeling very uncomfortable and at a loss for what my next step was supposed to be.

I now realize that was such a good place to be in. 

Because it launched me towards knowledge, understanding, and a desire to see change in the world.

Currently there are over 27 million people in slavery worldwide. That's just not okay, and I want to bring awareness and shed light so that we can change that statistic.

****

Last year, in order to find a way to get involved, I participated in a campaign called Dressember. 

In a nutshell, women use something inherently feminine (a dress) and use it to start conversations about the issue that is human trafficking; as well as try to raise funds that go towards rescuing people out of this terrible way of life.

For the entire month of December, I wore a dress everyday, took a picture, and posted on social media to spread the message. 

It was a truly powerful experience and I am doing it again this year. The only difference is that due to my theme of #simplicity, I will be wearing the same dress everyday for the entire month!

I think it is overall going to be such a good experience for me to simplify my everyday in order to give more thought to this serious issue. And how we can be apart of the change.

****

I would absolutely LOVE, is if you guys would consider joining me for the Dressember campaign.

However, I realize that not everyone is able to participate in the same way that I did. 

But, if you are interested in learning more about this and how you can make a difference, here are some ways to get involved:)

1) Consider giving up ONE specialty coffee and donating that money to my Dressember campaign

*One rescue mission costs approximately $100,000 start to finish, so every little bit helps!

2) Join our team and get in on the epicness that is Dressember:)

*If you can't wear a dress everyday, that's okay! You can still participate! And guys can get involved too! Wear a bow tie! That counts!

3) Share on social media this link to help bring awareness to the issue of human trafficking

*Awareness is a huge part of changing this narrative! How can we change what we do not know.

4) Be curious and willing to learn

*Books, documentaries, non-profit websites - the resources to learn are out there. Curiosity, even towards that which is uncomfortable, is a good thing.

Thanks so much for taking the time to read this and consider getting involved. 

Human beings are not commodities, and our world will be a much more beautiful place when we value the worth of someone for who they are, and not what they can be exploited for.

Feel feel to share and ask me more questions!!! Let's be world changers!