Last post I blabbed on and on about how great it is to shop with cash and how much popcorn I eat.
This week I am going to blab about how I am a big fat liar and the cash keeps disappearing from my wallet.
Oh, and I am also going to blab about the fact that I will never give up popcorn.
Do you hear me?
Real talk though? I was seriously considering giving up on this paying in cash thing this week.
Because by Wednesday I had spent all but $5 of my weekly budget.
Yes, you read that correctly.
Sheesh. What is wrong with me....
With my aforementioned $5, I took myself to Target Wednesday evening because I needed some ish.
Some lady stuffs, some coffee cream, some coffee. Stuff that is super boring but I am telling you about it anyway.
So, you're welcome.
I honestly do not know why I walked so confidently into the store. Like, $5 wasn't going to get all that stuff.
Okay, I actually forgot I needed coffee when I first walked in, and that's probably why my walk was so confident. Because when I realized that I needed coffee after grabbing my other stuff, I panicked.
Because... coffee.... #neednotwant
Yeah, I almost broke down and bought some of those delicious beans with my debit card right then and there. They were calling my name. Loudly and quite provocatively to be honest. Skanky beans...
But NO! I made a commitment dang it! And I was going to keep it.....
Even though I really love coffee (insert lots of tears)
All of a sudden, I had this idea. What about sample packs of coffee? Surely Target had to have something like that.
And they did. Just not for a dollar. Which is all I had left. #dangit
Then I saw it. Smiling down on me with it's obviously cheap packaging and super affordable price tag.
Specifically, Cuban instant coffee.
Because it was $.25 cheaper than Folgers instant coffee.
I'll shoot straight with you guys... I should've paid the extra $.25
This stuff tasted like that instant cappuccino powder that your mom used to keep in the cupboard for "special occasions."
For four days I drank the kind of coffee you drink on a missions trip. Acrid, thick, really dark, and kind of questionable smelling.
I can also say that I have never in my life used so much creamer in my coffee. I am hands down going to have cavities from this experience.
Yesterday I bought coffee beans and this morning I almost wept with joy as I poured liquid gold into my tumbler.
It was a truly spiritual moment. Angels were singing. Harps played backup. It was a good cup of joe.
In all seriousness, it really hit me hard when I only had a $1.00 leftover to buy coffee.
It hit me because people in America, and in other countries, live like that all the time.
They don't have the luxury of choosing dark roast or blonde roast. They don't have the choice of french vanilla or hazelnut. Grande or Vente.
Their choices are based on what they can afford, down to the very last penny.
The rest of the week felt pretty humbling. Because even though I have money in the bank and could totally buy coffee and be fine, I was pushing myself outside the comfort zone I have created.
I thought about that every time I opened a packet of that instant coffee.
It was a really interesting place to hang out.
I realized I am so much more blessed than I thought. I have so much more accessible to me than I acknowledge. And, I really have such a greater capacity to give back than what I have been telling myself I did.
So, if I have a clearer picture of what is entrusted to me financially because of a box of instant coffee, then it was $.94 well spent.
It was so gross. But it taught me well. And for that I am thankful.