simplicity 2016: packing

Right now I'm sitting in an airport.

Waiting to go visit one of my most favorite people in the whole world.

For five days.

I finished packing two hours ago.

Because, I'm the queen.

Is this arrogant? Probably.

Is it true? Absolutely.

I am the best packer I know. 

Not in the world mind you, because that would be pretentious on a whole different level.

But still, I'm pretty awesome at this whole packing thing.

And it's not that I'm OCD (although that's been said), it's just that I don't like a lot of clutter. 

Or a lot of things to be responsible for. 

I just want to enjoy where I'm headed and who I'm heading to.

And as I am settled in at the gate, waiting to board, I looked down at my backpack and duffel bag and smiled.

I've been dwelling a lot on how to simplify my life. 

But, I've forgotten to acknowledge the areas in which I'm already practicing it or have already established it.

Like today, when I went to therapy for the first time ever. 

I walked away realizing I am much lighter than I thought I was. 

Still have more to unpack, but I'm getting there.

So, as I look down at my bag, I'm filled with a strong sense of self acceptance.

Life isn't perfect, but I'm doing better than I think and making more progress than I give credit for.

Join me in giving yourself an air guitar jam fest. Because you are getting there. 

We all are.

#simplicity2016

simplicity 2016: i bought a watch

What is this? 1950? No one wears a watch anymore.

Or uses an actual alarm clock. Or does anything unless there is a digital aspect to it.

Honestly? It's kind of sad that the simplicity of certain actions are being lost amidst the technological chaos that is our world.

And I love technology (as I sit here and blog from my computer).

I just know I am missing out on cool things because of it.

As a kid, I would sit in the living room, watching my dad change all of the watches and clocks in the house whenever time change season would come around.

Let me tell you, it was quite the process. But also such fun to watch. There was a method and a system to it. And maybe I'm just a big nerd, but I loved it.

During this first week of simplicity, I have noticed some things. Had some observations if you will.

Some great, some embarrassing, some surprising.

- sticking to my budget is harder than I remember

- I have never been so excited to have money leftover to buy Thai food

- gift cards are a blessing when you have a budget

- social media is an evil curse and a fortunate blessing

- my phone battery is lasting so much longer than it used to

- using my phone less is freeing and annoying at the same time


I also realized how impatient I am.

If I have a random thought, I want to Google it immediately. Because, you know, I might forget that I want to know what a tortoise shell actually weighs. Or if they eat popcorn in India.

If I am at a red light, I want to check FB. Because apparently sitting still for two minutes is a ridiculous expectation to have for yourself.

If I want to know what time it is, I have to find a computer or grab my phone. Since apparently no one wears watches anymore.

So I decided I would get a watch. Nothing fancy, because you know I am on a budget, but functional and simple.

Last night I went to Target, with a gift card (see how I'm sticking to that budget??), and bought a watch for under $15.

This morning I put it on. Since that's why I bought it.

And you know what was amazing?

I barely checked my phone for the first 6 hours of the day. In fact, I left it in my car for most of the time I was out.

Talk about feeling free.

Then it hit me. That's why I waste time on my phone.

I pull it out to check the ACTUAL time, but become distracted by all its other notifications and functions.

I pull it out for one task and one task only, and before you know it, I am reading a BuzzFeed article about Kim Kardashian.

Which is insane because I don't even care about Kim Kardashian.. #facepalm

Today I really liked feeling free.

I also really liked being on time.

I also really really like my new watch.

Simplicity is fun. Sometimes it's hard. But today it was fun.

#simplicity2016

simplicity 2016: banana bread is great

When I was growing up, my favorite part of banana bread was the top. It was gooey and sweet and I was a picky little twit who was extremely particular about her food.

Still am, but now I eat my vegetables. Instead of lying about them giving me a headache. Such a great adult I am turning out to be.

Speaking of being adult, I now make my own banana bread, it's quite divine and might even be better than my mom's. (don't tell her)

Even if it is gluten free and...gasp....vegan. What is this world coming to?

And my favorite part now is ALL OF IT. As in the whole loaf. You heard me, the whole dang thing.

Since becoming a vegan almost four years ago, I don't bake nearly as often as I used to. Something about eggs and butter and gluten - all that stuff that makes baking easy.

But, when I do decide bake, it's still an oddly relaxing and centering ritual that can pull me out of the weirdest of moods.

It also doesn't hurt that I live alone and get to eat the entirety of whatever I create. So there's that.

This is still my first week of practicing an attitude of simplicity, and to be honest, it's a little exhausting.

Most likely due to the fact that I have to do everything 1000%, and the rate at which my brain is going is tiring and makes me want to eat.

And last night I did.

That loaf came out of the oven, piping hot and smelling of cinnamon and chocolate. For that is how banana bread should be made my friends.

I cut a slice, put a ginormous slab of "butter" on it, sat on the most perfect couch in the whole world with a cup of tea and took a deep breath.

Simplicity.

It's not just being a minimalist, or a penny pincher or even someone who goes off the grid.

I'm re-learning that sometimes it's just fully experiencing and enjoying the small things in the moment that they are happening.

You see, I had the bread again this morning and it was great. But you cannot re-create that piping hot, freshly baked slice of heaven unless you make another loaf.

It's a one time deal. And we shouldn't miss out on those. Because they are amazing in their simplicity. Designed to be enjoyed.

#simplicity2016

simplicity 2016: getting close

"You can't understand the most important things from a distance, you have to get close." 

I am a maker of lists. No, an expert at making lists. Scratch that, I am obsessed with making lists.

If someone told me to go through the day without jotting down my to-do's, I would laugh in their face and then grab my notebook.

It's a habit I have had for as long as I can remember. I guess it's my way of keeping control over the things in my life.

These last five days of practicing simplicity, I have found out some very interesting things about myself.

- I have been eating unhealthy amounts of Thai food (this budgeting thing is eye opening)

- I really like going to bed early (9:30 might just be my sweet spot)

- I enjoy eating dinner on my couch with television, but I am practicing eating at my beautiful table with silence. (it's a good thing)

- Finally, I am realizing I have a really hard time not over planning this whole simplicity thing. Like, it's crazy how much I want to control it...

This morning at our monthly staff meeting, our prez said, "God already has plans. Don't ask Him to join yours; instead, trouble yourself just enough to listen for His."

On my drive back from Cali, I knew without a doubt God was inviting me into His plan of simplicity for this year. 

But, over the last three days, I have obsessed with all the ways I can simplify. 

Making lists upon lists upon lists in my head. 

Today, I realized I need to stop trying to steer and navigate HIS plan and just enjoy the ride.

I need to not get burnt out by Day Six because I think I have to be an expert on simplicity by the end of the first week. 

Think I might be an over achiever?

I also reminded myself today, I do not need to be perfect in this theme or in life. 

I just need to be present and aware, willing to get close and ready to listen.

Only then will it all work out. The way HE planned. Not me.

#simplicity2016

simplicity 2016: sitting still is hard

I have always struggled with sitting still.

On a plane. The bus. At home. At church....

When I was six years old, I particularly fidgety during a midweek church service. And my mother had had enough of my squirmy ways.

Turning towards me, she said in the most terrifying voice you have ever heard, "If you move one more time, you are going to get it when we get home."

For the next hour, I barely breathed. IT was not something I wanted to experience if I could help it. So I forced myself to sit like a statue.

Also, my nose has never been so itchy. But alas, I could not scratch. Because if there is one thing I know about my mother, it is that she means what she says. Scratch or no scratch.

It was in that moment that I realized sitting still was not something I can accomplish unless I am SCARED TO DEATH.

So yesterday -  I got up, went to church, came home, made lunch, made soup for the week, put ALL my laundry away, got ready for work on Monday and read a book - all before 4:30pm.

It's amazing how much you can get done when you aren't Facebooking everything and/or binge watching Netflix.

And while I loved getting so much done and feeling so accomplished, I also felt bored.

Which is weird, because I have so many things I can do to entertain myself.

I have two pianos for crying out loud. This should not be so difficult.

But there I was, cuddled in my favorite chair with a book I have been dying to read, but I was still so antsy.

However, instead of turning on my TV or picking up my phone, I forced myself to feel the discomfort.

I made myself sit there. It was excruciating. I could almost feel my leg hair growing...

It was good though. The sitting there. Not the hair. That's bad.

I realized in those uncomfortable moments that I am and always have been afraid of missing out on something. What? I have no idea. I just am afraid I will miss it.

And for years, my solution has been to keep myself moving and to keep myself going so I won't miss any of the potential action.

But yesterday, I had an epiphany.

I have forgotten what it is like to sit in the quiet and just be.

I live in a world where I can fall asleep with my cellphone in my hand, constantly being entertained from the moment I go to sleep until the moment I wake up.

As long as my phone is charged, my house has power and my car stereo works, I never have to be bored.

But, that's the problem. I have forgotten how to be bored.

I have forgotten how to just sit and let my imagination run wild. I have become too structured in my distractions.

Simplicity? You are uncomfortable.

But because you are uncomfortable, I have food prepared for the week, I have started reading a delightful book, and I got over eight hours of sleep last night.

Not a bad start to the year. Hopefully the momentum holds, lol.

#simplicity2016

simplicity 2016: technology overload

Ah, the dreaded "get off your cellphone" post.

However, before you get pissed and leave this link to go check Instagram (it's there too btw), let me preface with the promise that I will not be a hypocrite.

I have texted while driving.

I have stared at my phone while crossing the street, only to almost get my butt run over.

I have stayed up until 12:30am reading BuzzFeed articles.

Who am I kidding, I was taking quizzes about what kind of pasta I should eat tomorrow.

Because apparently I cannot make that decision for myself. Even though I am a grown arse woman who pays rent and has a job.

I have been glued to my phone when someone was talking to me, and I didn't hear a single word they said. How rude of me...

I have used my phone as a distraction when I am bored, and a solution when I don't want anyone to talk to me.

So, I cannot get on a soapbox and tell other people what to do.

Instead, I'll just share how I am going to address my technology addiction.

Two nights ago, I left my phone in the living room before going to bed. And instead, like my parents did, used an old school alarm clock to get up the next morning.

It really shouldn't have created any anxiety, but it did. Not proud of that at all, but there I was, laying there wanting to check Facebook.

Even though the chances of my having any notifications were slim to none.

Last night was better. I was in bed earlier than normal and slept better than I have in months. That should tell me something right there.

My rational for years has been, "What if someone needs me?" And, if I am honest, the number of times someone has called at 2am are extremely low. So there goes that excuse.

I have also started putting my phone in my backpack instead of mounted on my dash when I am driving.

Why? Well, because I can tell myself that I am not going to text and drive; but I still get 'bored' at red lights and want to check social media.

Even though no one has messaged me, poked me or liked any of my crap.

Finally, I am putting my phone away while I am sitting in church. This shouldn't be something that's even an issue. But it is.

So, I put it in my bag, on the floor, out of sight. But it wasn't out of mind. Which is so terrible.

It's terrible that I cannot even sit through an hour and a half service without checking my 3"x5" piece of glass and radiation.

It's only been three days of  COAT (cellphone overload adjustment therapy). That is not a thing by the way. Maybe it should be, but that's just what I am calling this part of my simplicity challenge.

So what's my take away for that past few days?

I am sleeping better, my neck doesn't hurt from looking at the ground and I got so much out of the message this morning.

I also had time to cook all my meals from scratch, do laundry, clean my house, hang with friends AND read books. All while being in bed before or by 10:30pm.

What is happening in my life?

Simplicity.

That's what is happening, and I am kind of in love with it.

Even though it is uncomfortable and will take some getting used to.

Overall? It's pretty great.

#simplicity2016

simplicity 2016: counting the big bucks

Yesterday I cancelled a movie membership - for documentaries - because I'm a nerd.

Then I cancelled my Scribd account - think Netflix for books - because I'm a HUGE nerd.

Continuing with this theme, I cancelled my Sirius XM membership - because spotify, and I don't use it.

I've also decided to continue not buying weekly lattes - because, I find I like coffee at home more than a latte.

And finally, I lowered my data on my phone plan - because, I need to get off my dang phone.

I am also fairly motivated by saving money. Which is funny considering how many random things I pay for on a monthly basis. Didn't realize how much until yesterday...

Since my personal goal for this year is to simplify, I am looking around myself to see what I have that I don't use, what I pay for that I don't really want and what do I use in excess just because I am bored.

Hence the cancellation of more monthly subscriptions than I realized I was paying for.... #facepalm

I don't need to justify cancelling any of these expenses, but just for the sake of this post, I will explain for thought process.

Movie/Documentary membership: I have Amazon Prime, I use my best friend's Netflix, and pay for Hulu since I don't have cable.

Scribd: I may or may not personally own almost 200 books. I also have a library card for three different library systems....so, that's just ridiculous.

Sirius XM: As I mentioned, I have spotify. I also have a record player and many many CDs...don't judge me, I like CD's. I also miss cassette tapes, so there's that.

Coffee: Lattes are not a need, and caffeine in a ceramic mug totally tastes better. Especially when your ceramic mug is Wonder Woman. Or the poop mug. That one's great too.

Phone: I just really need to get off my dang phone. I am on it too much, wasting time and frying my brain cells... I am too dependent on a piece of technological equipment to keep me from being bored and to keep me safe.

And because I am SUCH a HUGE nerd, I tallied up how much I will save over the next year, just by cutting out these extras.

drumroll....... $1545.....

yes, you read that correctly, I will save almost two grand if I just stopping wasting my money...

Now, as a self proclaimed budgeting wiz, I am a teensy bit embarrassed by my mindless spending.

I mean, what happened to me? I have had a budget since I was 16. On a hand drawn spreadsheet. Because I find consumer math fascinating.

So then how did this happen... how did my spending get a little out of control. Because while I could easily tally these extra expenses, I also know that I can look at my bank account and see where the rest of the money goes.

I think, at least for me, my personal life has just become cluttered with so many unnecessary things, I have adapted and put myself on auto pilot.

Spending just because I think I need something. Not taking the time to see if I can get the same experience for free. Not checking to see if I already have batteries before buying more.

Last week, I spent Christmas with my Gramma (one of my favorite humans); and I had a revelation while I was there.

When I am at her house, everything slows down, and everything makes more sense. I'm not sure why, but it does.

And when I thought about that on my drive back to Seattle, I was deeply challenged to address this in my own life.

You see, I complicate things for myself.

Tangibly speaking, I buy stuff to make things easier in the moment, only to not need it or want it later. To me that's complicated.

I also waste. Not intentionally but I over plan and waste.

I also don't fully and completely appreciated the things I have. Because I am too busy buying crap.

And it's all because I am too much in my head and forget that I don't have to be perfect. And the expectations I have for myself? No one else has those for me. So I can calm the heck down.

2016? I am really glad you are here, and I am glad I get to simplify. Because, it's only day two and I already feel lighter.

#simplicity2016